To my younger self


What is love, little me? Believe me it is not “the butterflies you feel inside that makes you immune to reality” crap you are about to tell me! And please trash the idea of ending up with your first love, it did not happen (it happens mostly only in books).

Love is beyond the butterflies, physical attributes, material wealth, finesse, and of course the great sex. All these can only be toppings for the basic bit called love. Yes I call it basic because believe me it is. Love is built from trust, loyalty, honesty, respect and consistency unlike the fantasy you built your idea of love from.

Listen to me, one day, you will understand – because it is something you have to learn – that you need to be yourself and love yourself before you can truly experience love. So stop being miserable trying to earn the love that never was. Love is not earned! And from where I stand now, I know you will be glad it did not work out someday. You will also learn that love is not once in a lifetime like you have been made to believe.



10 thoughts on “Love

  1. Well stated. From the point of view of someone well into my fifties, and struck down by disability, it is the character and stability of commitment that defines love – a partnership that can endure hardship with compassion and empathy still in tact (and perhaps deepened because of it).

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You cannot properly love someone if you don’t love yourself…the unbalance will eventually cause problems. Love evolves from that hot spark early in the relationship to the ember that still glows (not as vividly perhaps) and keeps you warm in the waning years of the relationship. But a little sparking here and there never hurts at any age 😉

    Liked by 3 people

  3. As a wife and mother of 4 I often wonder if the simplicity of doing chores with my husband and raising our kids together to the extent of involuntary opting out of keeping personal dreams alive, is enough to sustain a marriage.. I do mourn the days of free spiritedness and passion and the idea of butterflies in the pit of my stomach.. Let’s say my naïveté persists

    Liked by 2 people

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